Traveling to Montana = Must bring cowboy boots

I always take my cowboy boots everywhere I go... they've even been to Portgual, Spain, and Italy for goodness sakes! They are my most comfortable footwear (maybe even more comfortable than my running shoes) and, in my opinion, are super fashionable AND... they are just me. I glanced at them sitting on my shoe rack the other day, all dirty and in desperate need of conditioning and decided they needed a break. Very bad decision.

Before I continue, I thought you would like to see a picture of my cowboy boot on a bench at the train station in Lisbon. I almost left it there (I wasn't wearing them because they got completely soaked in Aveiro)... poor cowboy boot.


OK, so now onto the purpose of my post... indications that I should have brought my cowboy boots to Montana:

1. Each state that uses the website I work for can choose an image that depicts their state, which then appears when they login... this is the image they chose.


2. On my flight from Denver to Billings, MT, I looked around and all I saw were cowboy boots and hats everywhere I looked!

3. When getting in the hotel shuttle from the airport, the driver was blasting country music. "If it weren't for trucks there wouldn't be tailgates..." Those were my favorite lyrics.

4. I have huge cuts on the back of my feet from shoes that are not as cool as my cowboy boots. I mean, look how big the bandaid is that I have to use! It's bigger than my iPhone!


OK, off to Cabela's (hiking shoes), go see some mountains, drink some Montana Brewery beer, and eat some country fried steak!

This is my life...

I'm leaving for Montana tomorrow morning. Typically when I go on trips I spend a lot of time putting together a very detailed itinerary weeks beforehand. Well, not this time. I've been so busy and it was one of those tasks that just kept getting pushed to the bottom of my list because knowing when your flight leaves isn't that important, right? So, by the time this evening came and I still didn't know what time my flight was to leave, I figured it was definitely time to check it out. It could be 6:15am, 7:45am, 8:15am... who knows?! So, I go to sign into the reservation website for my work travel which has never let me down the 7 years I've been using it and I see this...

So then I try to login to the airport's website and I get this...










Yup. That's right, it's a blank screen because there was NOTHING. So, then I figured... I'll call the airport and see if they have any suggestions on how to find my flight information and this is what I hear on the other end of the phone.

"This is Verizon Wireless, the number you have called.... blah blah blah..." OK then, what's next? I look up flight times on delta.com and I get this times 10 (my screenshot couldn't capture it all)...


Well that's helpful when there's 20 different flight schedules from AZO to BIL! What should I do? Well, what I am going to do is get my ass to the airport at 5:30 am and that way I'll be ready. Let's hope the obstacles don't continue!

Solutions to reimbursement difficulties.

So, my work is giving me a difficult time about reimbursing me for just about everything on a work trip I just took. One of them is for a taxi ride in which the driver was unable to produce a receipt, so I printed a copy of my bank activity with the transaction listed. Well, apparently that isn't good enough and they are refusing to reimburse me, so I sent an email that said...

"Some taxi companies don't give receipts, as was the case here. What am I supposed to do? Take a picture with my phone of myself in the taxi handing the guy money or my credit card?"

Oooops. I probably should have shut my computer for 20 minutes before sending that one... regardless, I "took a photo of myself" paying the taxi driver. Think this will work??
They also won't pay me for parking. I'm sorry, but I don't know of many parking meters that print receipts. Here's the photo I "took of myself" putting money in the meter.

Big disappointments...

I do this all the time and never learn...

1. WRITE AN EMAIL.... to myself.
2. SEND it.
3. A short time later...
4. My reaction.
5. What I find...

Merkin.

This post would probably be considered "R" rated, so read at your own risk.

I came across this word while on a vocabulary website. I was trying to find an interesting word for inspiration for an art project. Don't worry, this isn't the one I decided on to inspire me for my art (I'll continue my search after I post this), but I guess it ended up inspiring me to write this blog post... The word is, merkin. Apparently it means, a pubic wig for women. After reading this on a completely innocent website, I thought to myself, "What does that mean? Surely it's not what I think it is! A wig for your head made out of pubic hair or a wig for "you know where?" There must be a misspelling in the definition." They even had an audio clip for how to pronounce it.

So, then I thought, "Oh yeah, why don't I just Google it??! I'm sure to find an answer to my question that way!" Bad idea, Steph. Disturbing, yet semi- (I stress the semi) hilarious at the same time. There's strawberry shaped wigs, heart shaped wigs... yeah, I'm sorry, you probably didn't even want to know that. So, next time someone uses the word merkin, you'll know what it means.

What couch??

Oh yeah! The one I ordered over 2 months ago and haven't gotten yet?

This is a letter I received from the salesperson who sold me the couch.


This is my response letter that I will never send.

Dear Charles,

Thank you for the hand written letter - it was lovely. The plain white paper was a nice touch. The couch probably would be working for me beyond expectation, except that I haven't gotten it yet (yes, it's several days past the date you told me I should have it). In fact, I forgot that I even ordered a couch! I'm not sure if I should get excited again or continue to forget that a new couch is on the way, seeing that no one can really tell me what to expect. In regards to your offer to assist with any future needs, it would have been nice if you checked into the status of my order prior to sending this letter, so how about looking into it now?! You know what? No, scratch that.

Sincerely,
Stephanie

P.S. Just a tip, chew some gum next time you are making a sale (I know, that's kind of harsh, but so was your breath).

UPDATE SINCE I RECEIVED THE THANK YOU NOTE
The couch will now be ready in May, that's 7 weeks after the date we were supposed to have it... yup... I'm just going to go back to pretending I even bought a couch and when May (or December...2012) comes around I'll have a nice surprise!

GUEST BLOGGER - Annie

Since I am taking a short break, my sister asked if she could be a guest blogger. Here is her post... Thank you to Annie for keeping my readers entertained!

This is what happens when Stephanie takes a hiatus from [fill in the blank] ...